Life with a toddler

So, in case you were wondering, here's how an evening with a toddler goes. Dinner: Matty: "mik?" Me: "Would you like some milk, Matty?" Matty: "uh huh" with head shake yes. Drinks all his milk in less than 30 seconds. Eats most of the food on his plate. Me: "Matty, would you like some more?" Matty: "Muh?" with a head shake yes Me: "Here you go, Matty" Matty: "No! Uh duh!" followed by throwing his food and placemat on the floor 2 minutes later: Matty: "Muh?" Me: "Matty, would you like something else to eat?" Matty: "Uh huh" Me: "Would you like some yogurt?" "Would you like a cracker?" "Would you like some cheese?" Matty: "No" "No" "No" (I never did figure out what he wanted "muh" of) Bathtime: Me: "Alex & Matty, would you like some toys?" Both say yes. Dump toys in bathtub. Both promptly choose the same bath toy from the pile of 30 and proceed to fight over it until I take it away. After bathtime: Matty: "buhbuh. BUHBUH!" Me: "Why don't you show me what you want, Matty" (he lifts the lotion out of the basket) Put lotion on with his help. Me: "Matty, can you please come here so I can put on your diaper?" Matty: Giggles and runs away. Eventually get a diaper on him. And pajamas. Reading: Me: "Matty, would you like to read a book?" Matty: "Buh?" Me: (give him three options) "What books would you like to read, Matty? Matty: "Bahfwy!" (to which I assumed he meant the Hungry Caterpillar, so I started to read it) Matty: "NO, bahfwy!" (he then reaches for the ladybug book) Teeth brushing: Me: "Matty, let's go brush your teeth" Matty: "Teef?" (fight toothbrush; eventually brush teeth; make spitting sounds in sink like big brother) Me: "Ok Matty, let's go to bed" (walk towards his room) Matty: "No, ADIY!" Me: "You want to say good night to Alex?" Matty: "uh huh" and nods head walk down stairs (ok, Matty gets carried because he refuses to walk) Matty: "Night night, Adiy!" Alex: "Good night, Matty!" Bedtime: Me: "Let's snuggle for a minute" Matty: "NOOOOOOOOO" Me: "Come on, Matty, just a minute" Matty: "hut hut?" Me: "You want to do hop, hop?" (do hop hop song) After good night song and kisses, try to put him in crib. Arches back and screams. Eventually get him in crib after more hugs. Promptly screams for Adiy and won't go to sleep. And that's just 1.5 hours.